Monday, September 14, 2015

Five Years after the Psychic: The Results


On September 6, 2010, I had my first ever reading with a psychic. I had always been curious about what a psychic would tell me about my future, but had never done the research to find one. My coworker Kim at the time had a long-term “family psychic” who she had been seeing for years. She had high praise of the woman so I thought why not?

The psychic surprised me in that she was an older, eccentric, high-class white woman who was well kept, polished, and stylish. She didn’t seem like a scary, crazy, witch-like old woman like I had imagined. She had several huge diamond rings on her fingers and her nails were well-manicured. She performed her services in the basement of her South County home. We pulled up from the back of her house, which had an elaborate garden in her back yard.

When Kim and I arrived at her place, the psychic greeted us in the garden and of course, she talked with Kim about her family. While they were speaking, I stood by nervous and anxious about what was about to happen. I will never forget I felt a slight itch on my left temple close to my hair line. I gently moved my finger over the place with the itch. There was no scratch, bump, or blemish in the place from where the itch came. When I took my finger down from my face, I found blood on my fingertip. I was startled and alarmed because it was a good amount of blood and the place only had a slight itch and it didn’t hurt. I frantically, yet discreetly, wiped the place again with my fingertip until I stopped seeing blood. This happened all while Kim and the psychic were briefly catching up before my reading. I totally felt a sense of dread as if God was displeased with my decision to see the psychic and used the blood as a warning not to do it. Sadly and nervously, I still went through with the reading.

The Reading

For $50, you can buy or do a lot of things. On this particular day in 2010, I chose to spend 50 of my hard-earned dollars on a psychic reading. The psychic is so slick with her business that she only gives clients a 5-year outlook for a charge of $50. I’m sure that this is to ensure that people will come back. She used tarot cards and numerology to conduct the reading.  She also gives clients a cassette tape (yes, old school) of the recording from your reading. I can tell you the exact place in my home where my tape is, and still to this day, I have NEVER listened to it.

Here is a listing of the things that she told me that day, whether she was correct or not, and a synopsis of what has happened. You’ll notice that some of the things she told me were somewhat minute. This surprised me in that I expected nothing but life-changing events to be discussed. Keep in mind, Kim and the psychic gave me a disclaimer that things may be close to what she told me if not exact. This means that certain small details may not be exactly as she stated in the reading.

You will take two trips, including one for pleasure and one with your family. True.
I actually have taken no less than seven trips in the last five years. This includes two cruises, two family reunions (one to Mississippi and one to Chicago), a brief visit to Kansas City, an overnight trip to Chicago with my mom and sister, and an overnight trip to Memphis with two friends. So technically, she was correct. I did take two trips, including one with my family and one for pleasure.

You will pick up a woman who is close to you from the hospital. True-ish.
In late January 2014, I visited my mother while she was inpatient at the hospital for congestive heart failure. Although I did not “pick her up” from the hospital, I do believe that this is the incident that the psychic was referring to.

You will get a new job and you will take a class for the new job. True.
In July 2011, I started a new job with a health insurance company. The job included a 16-week training which was held in a classroom setting.

You will attend two weddings, one you will have to travel to and one you will be in the wedding. True.
It’s funny. This prediction just came to fruition within the last 6 months. In March of this year, I was honored to serve as a bridesmaid in my cousin Olivia’s wedding in Las Vegas. Then on September 6th of this year, the very last day of the 5-year outlook, I attended the wedding of my childhood friend Camille. This just made the deadline! Those are the only two weddings that I have gone to in the 5-year period.

You will have a minor medical concern similar to UTI. True-ish.
For the record, NO, I did NOT have UTI. However, I did have an abnormal pap smear a few years ago and needed a colposcopy (a scopic procedure and subsequent biopsy to determine if cervical cancer exists). I believe that this is the small concern that she was referring to, and fortunately the procedure resulted in no issue, disease, or cancer, as the psychic predicted. Thank God.

You will buy a house. False.
This has not happened, nor have I had any plans or efforts made toward doing this. Sorry girl, this didn’t happen.

You will be introduced by a relative or coworker to an older man with facial hair who is divorced. You will not be married to this man, or married to anyone by the end of the 5-year period, but you will be discussing marriage with this man. This one is complicated.
As you can see, this prediction consisted of a few different aspects.  First of all, no, I am not married. So she got that part right. She said that I would be introduced to this man. I have NOT been introduced to this man. However, there is a man, who is older than me and divorced with facial hair, who up until recently I was discussing marriage with. I met this particular man online. Currently, through some (very) recent developments, we are not in a relationship at this time. But to her credit, by the end of the 5-year period, yes, there was a man with such features, who I was discussing marriage with.

You will move to Texas in order to be with the aforementioned man. False.
As much as I want to leave St. Louis, I still live here. There is no definite plan in place to relocate to Texas, and definitely no plans of any kind to move there with the aforementioned man (who lives in St. Louis also).

The Aftermath

So, all in all, out of the 8 things in particular that this psychic projected would happen in my life, she got all but 2 things correct. Yes, I gave her the benefit of the doubt on three of the predictions, which she had more accurate than not. So she did alright.

On the morning after I had my reading, I found myself completely engulfed in thoughts, anxiety, doubt, stress, and sadness over the things that the psychic had told me. Every second after I had the reading was spent dwelling on what she told me. I was completely consumed, and I felt horrible about it. I felt like I had disappointed God by seeking a shortcut to my future rather than having faith and praying about my future, as a “good” Christian should. I got on my hands and knees the day after the reading, and with tears streaming down my face, I prayed to God for forgiveness for seeing the psychic. I felt ashamed for going to see her.

I would soon realize that in the days, weeks, months, and years after the reading, that through all major and minor experiences of my life, I would compare EVERYTHING to what that psychic told me. Any time I would be introduced to a man, I would automatically think, “I wonder if this is the guy that the psychic was telling me about.” Conversely, whenever I would meet a man who I was not introduced to, or who was not divorced, I would think in the back of my head, “this isn’t the guy because he doesn’t match what the psychic told me.” Can you imagine living for FIVE YEARS questioning everyone you met or every experience you had based on what someone told you years earlier? For lack of a better word, I have to refer to it as a form of torture.

How can you be optimistic, hopeful, and faithful about your life when you are basing everything on a list that someone told you years earlier? I wanted to be married. I wanted to be married badly on September 6, 2010, and I was heartbroken when I was told by the psychic that I would not be married within the next five years. Would things have been different had I not gone to her? That we will never know. The outcome possibly would have been the same. But the difference is that I would not have known it. I would have looked at every man I met as potentially being my future husband, rather than questioning them because they didn’t fit the prediction. I would have applied for every job outside of St. Louis with the hope and faith that I would get that job, not just the jobs in Texas because that’s where the psychic told me I would end up.

Even though over time I stopped dwelling and stopped constantly thinking about what I was told, these thoughts were permanently ingrained in the back of my head for the last five years. I always told myself that God is bigger than that psychic and her predictions, and that whatever He has for me, I’m going to get, regardless of what she said. However, the things that that woman told me were always a constant thought in my mind that I would never be able to erase. Although I don’t have any regrets in life, it is for these reasons, that I can’t help but think that I would have been better off had I never gone to see that psychic.

A few years ago, my former coworker Kim, who introduced me to the psychic, invited me to a “psychic party” that she was throwing for her friends and family, with the same psychic, in which we would all pay our $50 and get our readings. I immediately told her “no” and told her that I still had remorse over getting my first (and only) psychic reading. She has not asked me again.

Now, here I am a week after the 5-year deadline feeling completely free and completely lost at the same time. Because as bad as it is to say, I feel like I have no basis for what to expect of my future at this point, and I have not had that feeling in five years. I have used those predictions as such a crutch for living that now I don’t know what to think about my future. And before you say it, no, I am absolutely not going back to that psychic, or any other psychics for that matter. I want to experience life and its twists and turns without bias, fear, pressure, or expectation, but instead with excitement, hope, optimism, and faith.

If you are interested in seeing a psychic, I say do what you’d like to do, but make sure you are ready for the information that you will receive. Because once it is planted in your brain, you may not be able to un-sow that seed. Trust God, pray, and be hopeful always.